Every single thing about crossing the boarder between China and Hong Kong makes me want to slit my wrists. Actually, that’s not true: the Hong Kong side of the boarder is mostly civilized (but only by comparison). The Mainland China side…. Oh my god. Ok, where to start….
The bathrooms:
Hong Kong’s side of the boarder: they’re not very clean (because mainland Chinese idiots use them and litterally shit ALLLLL over the place) but at least they have normal, non-squat toilets and are equipped with toilet paper, soap, paper towels and an army of janitors.
China’s side of the boarder: I ONCE made the mistake of going in and I will never do that again. Horrors. Horrors.
The boarder employees:
Hong Kong’s side of the boarder: Quick, efficient, organized, lots of lanes open and all English-speaking staff.
China’s side of the boarder: Retarded. They only ever have one or two lanes open for Foreigners and their employees are shockingly incompetent, rude and slow - even for Chinese people (which is definitely saying something). Brandon, Josh, Nelly and I always choose which line to stand in based on which line has the least number of black people. Oh my god, it takes a boarder/customs official about ten minutes to clear a black person. Why don’t they at least try to hide their racism like America does?
There is one really bad part about the Hong Kong side. When you enter and exit Hong Kong you need to wait in the “Foreigner’s line” which means you’re in the same line as Mainland Chinese “people.” That means that you’re going to be cut in front of CONSTANTLY. Chinese people are uncivilized barbarian animals and have zero concept of waiting in line and will do anything including physically elbowing and shoving to get around you. Brandon and I have gotten ruthless and shameless when it comes to stopping “cutters.” We elbow right back at them even if they’re little grandmas and put our arms straight out in front of them. We yell and cause scenes which is TOTALLY offensive in China because of their “saving face” culture. Once, I kept seeing Chinese people walking straight up to the front of the long-ass line and getting right in front. I grabbed two guys by the backs of their shirts and yelled at them! It was soooooooooo satisfying. HAHAHAHAA! The other god-awful thing about having to wait in line with mainlanders is the fact that Chinese people don’t really understand personal space. They’ll LITERALLY LEAN ON YOU. They touch you, they lean their bag on you or put it on your foot, they get so close that you can feel their toxic cat-eating breath on the back of your neck. GOD!!!!!!! This is all made extra worse by the fact that most mainlanders don’t bathe regularly and most definitely have never heard of deodorant. Ohhhh, and then there’s the human excrement - yeah, Mainlanders let their children potty on the ground right there in line. One time Brandon and I saw a lady making her little boy pee into a plastic baggie. We thought she was the most considerate Chinese person that we’d ever seen!!
As if the boarder couldn’t get any worse, Brandon/Josh/Nelly and I once got stranded there on our way into Hong Kong. So, when we go to HK, we’d take a bus from Shunde (the city we lived in) that’d drive us to the boarder and then wait for us to go through customs then the same bus would take us all the way into the city. Of course, our worst nightmare happened - the bus didn’t wait for us. After being stranded for like two hours, without anyone willing to talk to us or help us, we finally paid for another bus (after we paid upfront for the one that left us) to take us to Hong Kong. Awesome. Of course we tracked down the bus company’s office that f’ed us and demanded our money back. After a lot of almost-yelling, the assholes gave us half of our money back for two tickets - but not four. WTF?!??!?!?!?!?!??!?!??!?!??!?!?!?
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