In China, driving down the wrong side of the road is more popular than eating rice.

China accounts for just three percent of the world's cars, yet has 21 percent of the world's traffic fatalities. “Research shows that every day in China at least 300 people are killed in traffic accidents, ranking the country top in the world for both the death toll and the death rate. And the figure is accelerating by 10 per cent every year."

JESUS FUCKING CHRIST – I hate Chinese drivers! Seriously, the government should outlaw cars. These people are 100% incapable of any component of driving. Turn signals, mirrors, seatbelts and children's car seats are never, ever ever used. Drivers don't stop at stop signs or lights, they never stay between the lines, they make U turns in the middle of the road (not really a u-turn – more like a six-point turn), they swerve like you've never seen before, they're always texting/talking on the phone while driving, they stop (in the middle of two lanes) on the highways, they drive drunk CONSTANTLY and they're pretty much always driving waaaaaaaay under the the speed limit. Chinese roads, parking lots and even sidewalks (why do they think it's ok to drive a car on a fucking sidewalk?!?!?!) are like war zones.
Watching people try to park their cars is one of Brandon's and my favorite hobbies in china. We've seen people park their cars in the center of a lane of traffic. We've seen people park on sidewalks. We've seen one car literally park diagonal and take up three parking spaces. And then there's parallel parking. Before I leave, I NEED to make a video of a Chinese person trying to parallel park. Usually, it involves the driver smashing into the cars in front and behind about 30 times and ends 10 minutes later with the driver pulling out of the spot and just parking with their car's ass hanging straight out into the street. It's awesome!!!

Crossing a street in China is SUPER hazardous. You never know where a car could be coming from (they're always driving on the wrong side of the road or hauling ass out of parking spots) and you better believe that NO ONE is going to slow down or swerve to avoid hitting you. I've probably spent a total of 15 hours in the past nine months waiting to cross streets in China. FUCK!!!!

Every foreigner has crazy driving stories. My favorite is when one of Brandon's business English students drove us to go play badminton. The gym that we were going to was about six miles away. It took us 25 minutes to get there. People on bikes were passing us! No, there wasn't any traffic, or construction and we didn't get lost. She was just a retarded Chinese driver.